


If I Just Said Yes

by WednesdayGilfillian



Category: Ghostbusters (2016)
Genre: Eventual Smut, F/F, First Dates, First Kiss, Fluff, Post-Canon, Rooftop Heart-to-Hearts, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-29
Updated: 2017-03-20
Packaged: 2018-09-20 15:20:04
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,220
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9498053
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WednesdayGilfillian/pseuds/WednesdayGilfillian
Summary: "She couldn’t just go home to sleep. Not on the one night that love and support and gratitude were scrawled across the night sky for her, Erin Gilbert."Erin & Holtzmann share an evening taking in the thank-you-card skyline...and, after that, things aren't quite the same.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! This is my first foray into this beautiful fandom...I'm a trifle nervous, but also very keen!
> 
> The idea for this first chapter came to me when I noticed how emotional Holtz's reaction is to seeing NYC lit up with thanks. I think we can assume that Holtz & Erin - more so than Abby & Patty - never had much affirmation growing up, and so that display of affection means a little bit more to them.
> 
> (Oh, and, in my version, the whole "we're dating" thing never happened, okay?)

Erin paused at the foot of the stairs, her heart racing. She was being ridiculous, and she knew it; tiptoeing around with her shoes in her hand like a kid sneaking home from a party. But she didn’t want the others to know she was going back to up the roof – tonight of all nights.

It would look…desperate. Needy. A bit pathetic, probably.

But she couldn’t just go home to sleep, either. Not on the one night that love and support and gratitude were scrawled across the night sky for her, Erin Gilbert. ‘Ghost Girl’. That just wasn’t the sort of thing that _happened_. (Except that, this one night, it had.) And when the sun rose, it would be gone.

So here she was, wrapped up in her robe, sneaking out like a kid in a British boarding school novel. She wouldn’t stay too long, she told herself. Just a little while.

\--

Erin stepped out on to the roof, and for a moment the splendour of the skyline dazzled her. Then her eyes adjusted, and she noticed the chair. And the person in it.

Holtzmann had her feet propped up on the low wall, her hands clasped together behind her head. She’d picked a prime spot, front and centre.

Erin froze. Perhaps she could still escape unnoticed? Backtrack? Tiptoe away?

“I’ve been expecting you.” Then, more quietly, “Damn, I need a swivel chair.”

Turning instead to look over her shoulder, Holtzmann offered a smile; one that was warmer and softer than Erin had been expecting. She flushed.

“Holtzmann,” she stammered, in an attempt at a casual greeting. “I-I was just-”  
“There’s plenty of room here, Gilbert. Come and join me.”  
The engineer moved a few things off the second chair she’d been using as a makeshift table, and patted the seat expectantly.

After a moment’s hesitation, Erin crossed the space to join her colleague. Holtzmann still had her hair tied up with a floral bandana, looking like some blonde version of Rosie the Riveter. Holtz went for the feminine look so infrequently that when she did it was kind of…striking.

She looked Erin up and down, and grinned.  
“Nice PJs.”  
“This is a robe, Holtzmann. And I’m fully-clothed underneath.”  
“Ah well,” the young woman sighed, as Erin sat down beside her. “A girl can dream.”  
Erin gave her shoulder a warning smack, without much real conviction.

“But on the bright side, I brought hot chocolate.”  
Holtz pointed to a flask at her feet. It looked a bit battered, as though it might have been in the firehouse kitchen for decades. You could always rely on Holtzmann to put old odds-and-ends to good use.

“Want some?”  
Holtz was unscrewing the lid of the flask. “I’ve just got the one mug, but uh, we can drink from different sides.”  
“Sure, thanks.”

As Holtz poured, Erin took a deep breath, gazing out at the skyline before them.

_THANK U GB_

_NY LOVES GHOSTBUSTERS_

_< 3 GB_

_XO_

“Here ya go.”  
Holtzmann handed across the small plastic mug, and Erin took a cautious sip.  
“Mm!” She made a noise of surprise. “You certainly like it sweet.”  
“That I do,” the engineer replied, taking a sip and sighing in contentment.

Erin had once read an article stating that the best place to have a real conversation was in the car. Sitting parallel, not having to look at each other, was supposed to make it easier to be open. That made sense, she supposed. The article hadn’t mentioned, though, that sometimes sitting side-by-side with someone will make you acutely aware of their closeness, and their silence, and the many things that could be running through their head…

( _What, exactly what, did Holtz think of her?_ )

Of course, caring what people thought was Erin’s modus operandi – it was why she was up on the roof at midnight. But that didn’t really explain…

“If you could,” began Holtz suddenly, in the ‘just an idea’ voice she sometimes used when suggesting something strange but brilliant, “which past-Erin would you bring forward in time, so that she could see this, tonight?”  
When Erin just stared, she attempted to clarify. “Like, twelve-year-old Erin? Erin at twenty-two?”  
“Umm…”  
“Or is that too personal? Sorry, it’s just – well, if _I_ could have given ‘Ghost Girl’ a boost, I totally would’ve.”

Holtzmann sounded so completely earnest, and Erin’s throat suddenly felt tight. (Had the sugary drink done something to her vocal chords?) She shook her head, wanting to reassure Holtz that she hadn’t overstepped.

“No, it’s fine. I guess…well, _any_ Erin could have used the boost, frankly…but probably fifteen-year-old me needed it most of all. The year before Abby transferred…I was a geeky, gawky mess, and I didn’t really have anybody.”

Holtzmann shifted slightly in her chair so that their thighs touched, and gave Erin a friendly shoulder-nudge.  
“A geeky, gawky mess who went on to save the world. And I bet you were actually adorable. That photo Abby showed us was hella cute.”  
Erin huffed a laugh, shaking her head the way she always did when somebody gave her a compliment.

“What about you?” she enquired, keen to shift the spotlight from herself. “Which past-Holtzmann should be seeing this? _And_ what would she be wearing?”  
The young woman laughed. “Would you believe my style has gotten _subtler_ over the years?”  
“Oh my god. I can only imagine.” Erin covered her face with her hands.  
“But yeah, I suppose…I suppose I’d pick ten-year-old Jillian. My foster parents were…um, less than ideal. I spent most of my time holed up in the garage, taking things apart and putting them back together. They – my parents – always wondered why broken TVs and radios would work again, all of a sudden. They put it down to the grace of God.”

Holtzmann managed a sardonic smile, but Erin couldn’t bring herself to laugh it off. This was a side to their genius engineer that she had never seen – she doubted whether even Abby knew this backstory. Tentatively, she placed a hand on her companion’s warm knee. Holtz’s eyes snapped up to meet hers, and after a moment she gave Erin a soft smile.

“So, yeah…I think 10-year-old Jill would have been pretty stoked to know that down the line she’d end up saving New York. And palling around with some super-smart, super-lovely ladies. _And_ working out of a freaking _firehouse_!”  
Erin chuckled, squeezing Holtzmann’s knee before withdrawing her hand. “It _is_ pretty great.”

“If little Jill was here though, fair warning – she had even less sense of personal space than me, when it came to people she liked.”  
“And she would’ve liked _me_? Wouldn’t she have thought I was…old and stuffy?”  
“Erin, you’re a Doctor of Particle Physics. She would’ve been sitting at your feet taking notes. God, she might even have tried to emulate your ‘tweedy academic’ look!”  
Holtzmann gave an affected shudder, and Erin laughed outright.  
“Dodged a bullet there, then. Wait, you haven’t actually built a time-machine, have you?”  
Holtz snorted by way of response, and Erin smiled. “Just checking.”

Holtzmann stretched. “Man, all this talking in third person is making me thirsty. More hot chocolate?”

After another shared cup, the soporific effect of the sweet, milky drink began to make itself known. Pleasantly drowsy and filled with affection for the whole of New York, Erin slipped down in her chair, her head coming to rest against Holtzmann’s shoulder. If the engineer was surprised, she didn’t show it.

Even as warm sleepiness rolled over her in waves, Erin knew they couldn’t stay out there forever. Like a thank-you-card skyline, moments like this had to be the exception, not the rule.

“We should go back in, soon.”  
“Mm. Though I could definitely stay longer, if only this roof had more comfortable accommodations,” murmured Holtz. “A hammock, a hammock, my kingdom for a hammock!”  
Erin chuckled drowsily, nestling into Holtz's shoulder a little more. “Would we both fit, though?”  
“As if I’d ever purchase a hammock that didn’t have room for company.”

They didn’t leave for another ten minutes.

\---

After that night, it became increasingly difficult for Erin to pretend that the way she felt about Holtzmann was clear-cut and simple. In fact, it became impossible.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You guys are the best! Thank you for your wonderful responses!
> 
> I hope you like this next installment; I'm going for shorter-chapters-more-frequently, but most of the others will probably be longer than this one. Consider it an interlude.

“Yes, Mom…Yes…Mmhm…”

Erin was holding the phone to her ear with one hand, the other resting on the book she had just unwrapped. Its title shone out in embossed gold letters.

_The Power of Saying Yes: The Modern Woman’s Guide to Unlocking Her Potential_

Erin had just begun to drum her fingers on the kitchen bench – a habit she’d picked up as a non-confrontational teenager who nonetheless had a lot of frustration to vent – when Holtzmann strolled in, whistling.

Her paint-splattered overalls were hanging by a single strap, and her hair was just as wild as usual. It wasn’t _fair_ , Erin mused, for a moment letting her mother’s monologue become white noise in her ears. Holtzmann made being dishevelled so…attractive. (By which, of course, she simply meant _stylish_.) If Erin had tried to go around like that…well, the results would not have been the same.

She realised suddenly that her mother had stopped speaking.  
“Err, what? Oh, sorry, I was just, um…”

Cringing, she glanced over at Holtzmann, who was politely pretending not to overhear, but was nonetheless evidently curious. ‘It’s my mother’, Erin mouthed, and Holtz mouthed back ‘Ohhh’, turning away to search the fridge for a snack.

“Sounds great, Mom, and yes, I’ll definitely let you know how I like the book. Anyway, I’d better go – Abby needs me to help with something. Say hi to Dad for me. Yes. Okay, bye!”

Setting her phone down with a little sigh of relief, Erin turned to find Holtzmann sitting up on the kitchen bench, swinging her legs and eating a large spoonful of apricot yoghurt.  
“That was, um…”  
“Another cheery chat with your endlessly-understanding mother?” Holtz supplied, her lips quirking.  
“Uh, yeah. Exactly,” Erin laughed, and relaxed – feeling the sense that she had to explain herself ebbing away. Holtzmann understood. Of course she did.

“What’s the book?” the engineer asked, slipping off the counter to dispose of her yoghurt cup.  
“Oh, it’s a birthday present.”  
Seeing Holtzmann’s frown of bemusement, Erin explained.   
“I opened it a few days early. Mom phoned to check that her parcel had arrived, and when I told her it had, she insisted that I open it. Apparently it was very important that she explain why she chose it – and that I start reading it as soon as possible.”

Her brow furrowing in such a way as to imply ‘What the heck?’, Holtzmann sauntered over and picked the book up from the counter.  
“ _’The Modern Woman’s Guide to Unlocking Her Potential’…_? She does realise you helped save the _actual world_ a month ago, right?”  
Erin laughed.  
“Uh, no, she doesn’t. And neither should anyone else, remember? That’s top-secret. Mayor’s orders.”  
“Oh yeah, right…” replied Holtzmann, absently, absorbed in flicking through the first few pages.

Erin had just realised that she probably shouldn’t have let Holtz get her hands on the book, when the young woman let out a sudden derisive snort. Holding the book at arm’s length, she began to read.

“ _You may not realize it, but the things you deserve – career advancement, a wardrobe upgrade, that handsome CEO – are all, in fact, within your reach._ Did you realise that, Erin? Isn’t that good news??”

Erin rolled her eyes, laughing under her breath. If this hadn’t been Holtz, she might’ve been embarrassed; but she knew it wasn’t _her_ the engineer was mocking.

“Yeah, yeah, Holtz. It’s really great. Now give me the book back?”  
The blonde shook her head, eyes still focused on the text.

“Hang on, there’s got to be a catch. Ah yes, here we go: _If you follow the Steps I lay out – and maintain a strict regimen of diet and exercise – you will find that you can have all those things you most want, if you simply say ‘yes’. _I’m really not sure that claim can be substantiated. I mean, where’s the scientific backing? _”  
_ “To be fair, I think she’s speaking metaphorically. She’s not saying ‘yes’ is a magic word, she’s-”  
“Wait, _wait_ , Erin – there’s a section on classy elevator small-talk! That comes under the ‘Networking’ chapter.”  
“Jeez, Holtz – spoiler-alert!”

Holtz sputtered a laugh at that, and Erin felt herself give in to the warmth in her stomach. It was surprisingly nice, surprisingly _easy_ , letting go of whatever small dignity she might once have kept. The only thing to do, really, was laugh – and Holtzmann made that such an appealing option. Still, she kind of wanted the book back, if only to stop the young woman looking so smug.

“Okay, Holtzmann, you’ve had your fun-”

The door opened, and Abby and Patty came in, their brows furrowed in bemusement.  
“What’s going on?”  
“Erin got an early birthday present, from her mother. It’s a self-help book, and it’s absolutely awful.”  
Holtzmann’s tone was positively sunny.

 _Well,_ Erin thought to herself, _she does have a way of putting things succinctly._

The other two came over to inspect the book over Holtzmann’s shoulder, and Patty murmured the title to herself.  
“… _Guide to Unlocking Her Potential’_? Ain’t that kind of a passive-aggressive gift?”

Silence greeted this pointed observation, until Erin feebly joked, “I didn’t realise you’d met my mother.” They all chuckled, and Holtzmann seemed to take that as her cue to take some of the pressure off Erin.

“But actually, guys, I don’t think this can be serious – it has to be a masterwork of irony. I mean, that hairdo is _clearly_ a cry for help.”   
“You’re not wrong,” agreed Abby, wrinkling her nose at the author’s photograph.  
“Ooh, maybe if we switch round the words in the title of each chapter, we’ll discover a secret message! Something like, ‘Please rescue me from this country club hellscape!’”

Abby tugged the book from Holtz’s hands, before she could pull out a pencil and set to work.

“There you go, have your book back, Erin. I hope it brings you much happiness.”  
“Thanks,” she grinned, still chuckling at Holtzmann’s ridiculous suggestion. She set the book back on the counter, then turned to find Abby still there, watching her.

“But uh, just in case that book _isn’t_ a barrel of laughs…let’s all do something for your birthday? Whatever you’d like. It’s your choice, Ghost Girl.”


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Surprise, this fic still exists! I got sidetracked writing AUs, and now I'm not so sure about this one...but I started this, so I'm gonna try and finish it, dagnabbit! I've so appreciated your lovely comments!
> 
> This chapter (you'll be astonished to hear) has turned out to be a total fluff-fest...but it's Erin's birthday, so maybe that's okay? I'll try and get us from here to some vaguely-realistic relationship-development. (But let's be honest, it's still gonna be over-sweet.) Hope you enjoy...

Erin was touched by Abby’s quiet offer. She hadn’t really celebrated her own birthday in years – not beyond treating herself to a fancy coffee, or maybe a new book. But now she had Abby back in her life, and Patty and Holtzmann to boot. This year, she was actually almost…excited.

And one idea kept reasserting itself. It was silly...but it was something she had (somehow) never done, and Abby _had_ said it was up to her.

“Guys?” Erin raised her voice, shifting her weight from foot to foot nervously. “I’ve, uh, had an idea for what we could do on my birthday.”  
The other Ghostbusters dropped what they had been doing at once. Holtzmann tossed a screwdriver aside and looked up with a grin of slightly-manic interest. 

“Well, it’s kind of pathetic, but I’ve never actually been to a pajama party…”  
Abby frowned. “You have too! Remember that time in junior year when-”  
“We only changed into PJs because your brother got us with that bucket of water set up over the door. I wouldn’t exactly call it a _party_.”  
“Fair point.”

“So I was thinking, I don’t want to disrupt everyone’s working day, but maybe we could all have a girls’ night here in the firehouse? Just hanging out and, I don’t know, watching a movie and eating some cake in our PJs?”  
Even as she spoke, Erin worried that she might be asking too much. These people _liked_ her, she knew that, but asking for anyone’s social time always made her anxious.

“Sounds good to me!” grinned Patty. “And if you really _had_ to ‘disrupt our working day’, I mean, I could probably find it in my heart to forgive you. Like, seriously.”  
Erin laughed as Patty batted her eyelashes in an attempt to persuade her. Everyone was grinning, and she felt a warm rush of relief.  
“PJ party it is!” Abby declared. “Right, I had better make a list…”

\--

Over the next few days, Erin found herself being ‘subtly’ pressed for relevant information – usually by Holtzmann, who would saunter up with ostensibly random questions.

(“If you were on a desert island…orrr, say, at a party…what sort of wine would you want to have on hand?”)

It was all very sweet, and Erin woke up on her birthday feeling more excited about it than she had for years. When she arrived at the firehouse, Abby and Patty were already there – and Erin’s desk was covered in streamers and balloons.

“You guys!” she laughed. “You didn’t have to.”  
Patty grinned. “That was almost entirely Holtzy. And she would’ve done more, but we sent her off to the garage. That girl c _annot_ sit still this morning.”  
“Yeah,” nodded Abby. “She’s really struggling with Erin’s-birthday-but-business-as-usual. Sure you won’t cave and let us spoil you _all_ day?”

Erin felt suddenly warm at this news, and was almost tempted to toss aside her plans for productivity. But she only laughed, and shook her head.  
“I do want to make some headway on this new chapter. Let’s see how we’re going in the afternoon.”

For all her good intentions, Erin found it unusually difficult to focus on her work. The balloons Holtz had set up floated cheerily above her desk, and Erin found herself smiling stupidly into space for long minutes. To make it worse, she realised that she didn’t actually have all the research she needed to finish her piece.

“I think I need to take a trip to the library. Anyone else wanna come?”  
“Is that even a question?”  
“Count me in,” Abby agreed with their resident history buff. “Holtz must be just about done fixing up the new ECTO. Go and see if she wants to come, will ya?”

Erin entered the garage cautiously – you really never knew what you’d find, with Holtz – but it seemed to be an unusually hazard-free environment. The stereo in the corner was blaring an infectiously-cheerful Wham! song, and the new vehicle was looking really impressive. Holtzmann was just shining it up with a rag, bopping to the beat as she worked. Erin smiled to herself, reluctant to interrupt.  
“Uh, Holtz?”

The engineer spun around.  
“Birthday girl! Heey!”  
Grinning at Erin, she leaned nonchalantly against the car – which might have been smooth, except that the car had just been polished and the rag in her hand was oily. Her hand kept sliding so that she went slowly and inevitably from upright to nearly-diagonal – and her response to this was to pretend that it wasn’t happening. Her grin remained confident, if a little manic. Erin _tried_ to keep a straight face.

“Hi, Holtz. Thanks for the balloons.”  
“Oh, that was nothing. Wait till ya see what we’ve got lined up for tonight.”  
“I can only imagine. For now though, we’re thinking of heading out to the library. Want to join us?”  
“Sure thing. Be with you in a flash, just gotta get out of these greasy things.”

Holtz drove them all in the shiny new ECTO-1, threatening the entire way to redirect their route to an ice cream parlour or a cupcake store or somewhere more suitable for Birthday Activities. They reached the NY Public Library eventually, though – at Erin’s insistence – and as they passed the famous lion statues Holtzmann gave the nearest one her two-finger salute.  
“Hey there, Patience. We’re on good terms,” she explained confidentially to Erin, who could only laugh in bemusement.

Once inside, they all went their separate ways, drawn magnetically to their areas of interest. Erin got straight to work, searching the system and locating the books she required. Maybe it _was_ nerdy, coming here on her birthday, but heck, libraries were where she’d felt most at home – until the firehouse, of course.

Once she’d checked out her books – a large-ish pile – she waited near the doors for her colleagues. Before too long Abby and Patty appeared.  
“Ready to go? Where’s Holtzmann?”  
“She’s coming, I think.”  
“Holtzy got distracted by the MakerSpace,” Patty explained, looking over her shoulder.  
“The what-er-space?”  
“It’s a kind of crafting station that encourages children to disrespect the nature of the library by making mess and noise,” Abby grumbled.  
“Aww come on Abby, we’ve had this discussion,” sighed Patty. “It comes down to whether you want libraries to be about people or about books.”  
“You know how I feel about people.”

Holtzmann turned up at that moment, grinning eagerly.  
“I’m here, I’m here. Sorry, team. Had important business to attend to.”  
Abby and Patty led the way out the doors, still bickering about library etiquette, and Holtz fell cheerfully into step with Erin. She shot her a charming smile.

“Can I carry your books?”  
“I bet you do that for all the girls.”  
“Only the cute ones.”

Erin could feel her cheeks going pink. This was so cheesy, so obviously un-serious, it shouldn’t be making her _feel_ anything. But the voice in the back of her head was unrelenting.

_You walked into that. You were hoping for it._

Rolling her eyes in a way that she hoped made her seem above such tomfoolery, Erin slipped the pile of books into Holtz’s waiting arms. The younger woman tucked the pile under her chin, looking all too pleased with herself, and they set off after Abby and Patty.

“Oh, I’ve got some things for you,” Holtzmann said suddenly, glancing down at the armful of books that encumbered her movement. “They’re in my pocket, if you could just…”

 _Is she doing this on purpose?_  
Of course, in order to do anything on purpose she would have to have known that Erin had any particular feelings about her pockets, and their proximity to…well, to her. Which, of course, Erin did not. It was exactly like reaching into Abby’s pockets would have been.

Or that’s what Erin told herself.

Flustered and bemused, Erin looked down at the two small items in her hands. Holtz launched into an uncharacteristically-sheepish explanation.  
“I, um, I was checking out the MakerSpace, because they were teaching kids how to use a 3D printer – oh, man, Erin, it was so cool – and this little girl saw me watching and offered to show me how it worked. And I mean, I _knew_ , but she clearly wanted to show me. And she asked me what I wanted to make, and I told her it was my friend’s birthday so I should make something for her, and she asked what your favourite things were, and I said science and ghosts. So we printed a little ghost, and then she made you a bracelet too. Her name is Sabrina and she wishes you a happy birthday.”

Holtz had said all that so fast that Erin struggled to take it in, but as she stared down at the little plastic ghost and the beaded bracelet with letter-beads that spelled out ‘SCIENCE’, she could practically _see_ Holtz sitting at a child-sized table, somehow fitting in perfectly. Warmth bubbled up in her chest.

“Well…thank Sabrina very much. I love them.”  
To demonstrate how much, Erin slipped the elastic bracelet onto her wrist, not caring that the bright beads looked juvenile beside her watch. Holtz beamed.

\--

After that, Erin more or less gave up on her business-as-usual plan. She was a little too…fluttery to get any more done. When they got back to the firehouse, the others banished her to very restricted quarters so that they could set up for the party. She was instructed to change into her pajamas too – and when Abby came to fetch her some time later she hooted in delight.

“Look at youu! Your sleepwear-tastes so haven’t changed.”  
“I do own other things,” Erin protested, tugging self-consciously at the sleeve of her pink button-down pajamas. “These are just my most party-appropriate. Yours haven’t changed so much either.”  
Abby was wearing a similar set, but they were significantly less pink and more plaid.  
“Yeah, well, we stick in our ways. Now, come with me, birthday girl!”

The kitchen and living area had never looked so festive. Patty was waiting amid balloons and streamers and a table full of treats. Erin laughed in delight at the sight of Patty’s onesie.  
“Well, ain’t we just the cutest things!”  
“Holtz is either paying the pizza delivery guy or changing into her PJs. Hopefully not both at the same time…” Abby chuckled to herself.  
_He should be so lucky…I mean, what?_

“I come bearing food!”  
Holtz appeared a few moments later, carrying several boxes of pizza. When she put them down, her PJ-ensemble became properly visible. ‘Ensemble’ may have been the wrong word – she was just wearing a loose t-shirt and a pair of little shorts. There was…a lot of leg, at least by comparison to her usual look.

“Holtzy, did you even try?”  
“This is as pajama-ed as I get, Pattycakes. I run really hot at nights, so usually I just sleep in-”  
“Ah, um, I think we should eat this pizza before it gets cold,” stammered Erin, quickly.  
“Good call,” Holtz nodded, smirking. “Heey, look at you in your jim-jams. What a cutie.”  
She booped Erin on the nose and moved to serve the pizza, whistling cheerily. It was a moment before Erin’s brain supplied the lyrics that went with the tune.

_She’ll be wearing pink pajamas when she comes…?_

Abby poured the wine, and soon they were all sitting round on couches and cushions and the floor. Patty grinned around at them all.  
“Don’t think y’all are getting away without a picture of this, by the way. I mean, me in this onesie _needs_ to be recorded for posterity.”  
“Damn right it does,” Abby agreed. “So, the schedule goes: pizza, wine, movie, wine, birthday cake, drunkenly Ubering home?”

That turned out to be a pretty fair assessment. They hadn’t skimped on the wine, and Abby in particular wasn’t holding back. Erin suspected she was a little emotional about their first birthday together as reunited friends – and she was just as glad to have Abby back.

The credits were just rolling for the movie they’d picked – a sappy romcom that Patty got surprisingly invested in – when Holtz leapt up from the couch and ran to rummage in the cupboard.

“Cake time! Which means COMPULSORY HATS! Except for you, Erin – _you_ may choose,” she declared, grandly.  
“ _Obviously_ I’m going to wear the hat,” Erin replied, feeling the alcohol fizzing in her veins.  
“Was hoping you’d say that,” grinned Holtz, putting on her own party hat and snapping the elastic under her chin. She looked adorably ridiculous.

Abby and Patty got to their feet too – “better make sure Holtzy doesn’t try to light the candles with a blowtorch” – and soon they were carrying out a glowing cake. Erin tried not to think too hard about the number of candles, focusing instead on her friends’ faces in the candlelight, and their…erm, enthusiastic singing. (Holtz and Patty could certainly carry a tune…)

“I don’t know whether you’ve noticed,” Holtz pointed out, “but it’s covered in tiny bowties.”  
“I got that, thanks Holtz. Thanks _all_ of you.”  
_Oh my God, it’s a cake, Erin. Don’t get emotional._  
“Come on then. Make a wish!”  
“Hope I’ve got the lung capacity for this,” Erin joked, before closing her eyes for a moment.

She hadn’t _meant_ to wish anything seriously. But it turned out she did. (And it wasn’t for any of the things suggested in _The Modern Woman’s Guide to Unlocking Her Potential._ )

But then she was blowing the candles out, without too much trouble, and everyone was whooping and cheering. Holtzmann smiled coyly up at her through her eyelashes.  
“Whadya wish for?”  
“Holtzy, you know damn well you cannot ask that! You gotta respect birthday-wish protocol more, man.”  
“Just curious…”  
Holtzmann’s innocent-face was at once clearly put-on and also strangely hard to resist, and Erin was grateful that Patty had her back.

The cake was rich and delicious, and went down very well with more wine – after which they really saw peak-Abby. She started reminiscing about her and Erin’s school days, and somehow that turned into a campfire-style sing-along. When she broke into ‘I Love the Mountains’, Patty just shrugged as if to say “This ain’t my fault” and joined right in.

“I LOVE THE MOUNTAINS! I LOVE THE ROLLING HILLS!  
I LOVE THE FLOWERS, I LOVE THE DAFFODILS!”

Giggling at the sight of them, and feeling pretty far gone herself, Erin wandered away to the kitchen bench, quietly singing her own rendition:

“I love the ECTO,  
I love my proton pack,  
I love our jumpsuits,  
I love some complex math,  
I love the firehouse, when all the lights are low…”  
“ _Boom-dee-a-da, boom-dee-a-da,  
Boom-dee-a-da, boom_!”

Holtzmann had followed her to the kitchen, and was dancing in her direction, grinning. (There was a lot of shoulder-action.) Erin laughed, only a little embarrassed, and they both leaned back against the bench, watching their two friends.

“We have to record this, right?”  
“We have to record this,” Erin agreed. “I haven’t seen Abby get like this since college.”

Holtz huffed a laugh and grinned across at her, and suddenly the air felt sort of thick. It was that side-by-side thing again; that same feeling she’d had that night on the roof. They weren’t alone, but they might as well have been.

“Hey,” Holtz nudged her shoulder, “happy birthday, Ghost Girl.”  
“Thanks, Holtz. It’s been a really good one.”  
“Whaddaya say, after we’ve caught a little of their shenanigans on tape, we share a cab home?”  
“Sure.”  
“Cool. Just so ya know, though – I’m not getting out of my PJs.”

Erin didn’t either. She was too tipsy and happy and it made the others laugh so much, to see their once-uptight friend climb into a taxi still wearing her cutesy pink pajamas. The driver had to have seen worse.

And Holtz walked Erin up to her apartment, and left her at the door with a soft, smiling “sweet dreams, birthday girl.”

Later, while she was brushing her teeth, Erin looked up at her giggly, tousle-haired, flushed-cheeked self in the mirror. Looked herself square in the eyes.

_So, are we going to talk about that wish you made, or…? No? Not yet?_

Instead she flopped down her bed, and turned to the books on her nightstand for distraction. There it was: _The Power of Saying Yes: The Modern Woman’s Guide to Unlocking Her Potential._ It was awful, but on the other hand maybe it was just what she needed – a good dose of dull, grounding reality. She flicked to a random page.

_“When it comes to unlocking your potential and achieving the happiness that is so within your reach, the first step is to dare to admit what it is you really want.”_

Erin snapped the book shut and put it back on her nightstand, giving it a look of accusation.

“You’re no help at all!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apparently Ghostbusters-tipsily-singing is my thing? And if you now have 'I Love the Mountains' stuck in your head, I'm not sorry 'cause SO DO I.
> 
> And I swear, the next chapter will be slightly less silly. I'll try real hard.

**Author's Note:**

> Let me know if you liked it...?


End file.
